September 27, 2022

Kunle JJC: The Problematic Neighbour (Part 1)

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Kunle JJC: The Problematic Neighbour (Part 1)

Moving into a new place would always be a hassle.

Mike’s guess was right. Fresh off University and after a year of service to his country, he was one of those lucky ones that were retained. The offer was good and he had a passion for the job, he couldn’t turn it down for anything.

The only headache was that he had to leave his family and friends in the eastern region of the country and reside in the western region. He was worried, he barely understood the lingo they spoke nor could he eat the food there but he hid it well from his mother. She would discourage him from taking the job.

As a man, he had a responsibility. The sooner he faces difficulties in life, the sooner he can take care of his responsibilities. Mike linked with one of his friends who served with him and got help in securing an apartment close to his new workplace.

It was a one-room apartment where he had to share a toilet and bathroom with two other tenants. He did not mind sharing, the place was conducive and cheap meaning less strain on his income. He moved into the place with his friend in tow.

After introducing him to the landlord and helping him get his receipt, the friend left him with the landlord and went his way.

The man took him on a tour around the house, showing him where the toilet and bathroom were, where to do laundry and dry his clothing, and the kitchen. Mike tried to follow the man’s explanations. As soon as they got to a particular place, he understood where they were, therefore what the man said wasn’t hard to understand.

The landlord brought Mike to the room he would stay in and started dishing out rules and regulations, he got lost immediately. He was unable to make a single sense of what the man was saying. To save both of them the stress, he quickly cut his landlord off in his most polite manner.

Since Mike hadn’t been complaining all through the house tour, his landlord had forgotten that they spoke different languages and he would be needing a translator to communicate with him. After a brief moment of silence that looked like the man was processing his next line of action, he swiftly looked left and bellowed, “Eunice” using his lingo accent which almost drew a laugh out of Mike.

After what seemed like an eternity, a young lady rushed out of the rooms on the opposite side of Mike toward him and the landlord. She stood there beside the man and kept nodding her head as he spoke on and on.

Even though she never shifted her gaze away from Mike’s face, it was obvious that her ears belonged to the old man at that moment.

Once the man stopped talking, she began explaining to Mike that, the gate to the house would be locked by 9 pm every night, therefore, he has to be home before 9 pm or risked getting locked out, and there should be no cooking in the room, the use of hot plates is prohibited, smoking is not allowed, loud music is not allowed, making noise generally is not allowed and also, fighting with other neighbours is not allowed. If he has any issues with anything and anybody, he should reach out to the landlord who will find solutions.

The girl’s English was not up to standard but she communicated the landlord’s wishes well. He couldn’t ask her to do more than that, he was grateful that she had come to his rescue. They both left him alone and he was able to move his luggage in.

Moving is a hassle, he had to clean the room of dust and put his things in place. It was already late when he finished, so he headed for the kitchen to fix himself a meal. It was quite annoying as he stood out like a sore thumb, women and ladies moved in and out of the kitchen, each cooking at their spots, Mike took the spot available and after saying his greetings, got to his cooking.

He was the only male and also the only easterner there. The women folk just talked in their lingo and laughed loudly. Mike was unsettled, it looked as though they were mocking him.

The girl from earlier was present too but she paid him no attention, she had herself buried in a chore that was supervised by an older lady who is not old enough to be her mother. Mike finished his cooking as quickly as he could and headed for his room.

The first night went OK with no fuss. He spent the second day (a weekend) trying to get gadgets he would be needing and also touring the new area. There was no one for him to speak to at home and he didn’t want to feel bored.

When he got back, he walked into the lady that supervised Eunice the night before and greeted her but she just walked past him.

Mike was confused, did the last just ignore him? Was he not audible enough or did the lady not understand English? He had no answers, he shrugged it off and spent the rest of his day fixing his room.

The next day was a Sunday, Mike had only two plans, to sleep and to do laundry. He woke early and did his laundry before his neighbours would take space on the lines. After a shower, he fell into a nice sleep and woke up close to noon, the house seemed quiet.

He went to check his clothes on the lines when he ran into Eunice who seemed surprised to see him. He tried to avoid her but she spoke to him asking why he hadn’t gone to church.

He explained that he wasn’t a religious person and wanted to leave when Eunice asked for his name. Maybe Eunice would be his first friend in the house, he told her and she made a request he found amusing, she asked if he could teach her the eastern lingo.

He wondered why she wanted to learn it or even if she could understand it but, no problem, he would do his best. He went about his way and she did too. The first week at work came easy, he had worked there for a year before so he had a better relationship with his co-workers, unlike his Co-tenants. His face was scarce at home till the weekend.

Mike had just finished a glass of wine and was drifting into a nap when a knock on his door woke him. It was Eunice, she wanted to borrow his phone and also learn his eastern lingo. He gave the phone to her and tried to put a cloth on, and get a notepad and pen to begin the session. He came out of his room and Eunice was nowhere to be found. He wondered where she could have gone to, did she just rob him of his phone, was she doing something with his phone in her room? Maybe taking nude pics?

That was a wild thought, he returned to his room and waited for her to return his phone. She knocked, returned the phone in a jiffy, and asked that they postpone the tutorial.

Even though it was just a wild thought, immediately he got his phone, he quickly tore through the gallery to see if she had taken nude pics on his phone. He was disappointed, she didn’t, he checked the call log and found out she had made calls instead. What was he thinking? That the girl was feeling him enough to borrow his phone and fill it with nudes?

That’s somewhat a tall dream. Mike laughed at himself silly and got back to sleep.

The second day was more rest for him and he was having his rest when Eunice came to knock on his door again, she didn’t want his phone this time, she wanted Mike to escort her on an errand. He was confused.

Written by Reezy Sama

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Dr. Deolu Oniranu-Bubble

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