Average Joe (18+): The Proposal III - 'Deolu #ONIRANU Bubble!
April 18, 2021

Average Joe (18+): The Proposal III
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Average Joe (18+): The Proposal III

Funke lived in a house that could easily be described as a mansion. In a choice part of the city, an estate which provided 24 hour power and security with an environment so clean that you could eat ice cream off the pavement. She had everything she could ever want.

Her father had left his company to her at such a young age and she was doing a good job of keeping the business growing. I admired her for that, asides other things about her that deserved my admiration.

I’d stopped by a mall to get the two of the best bottles of white wine I could find and my bottle of Red Square, my favourite vodka. I was in Funke’s house about an hour later, although it was a Sunday traffic never seemed to relent. I called her to let her know I had arrived at her gate and she got her security guard to let me in. I drove in and parked next to the Toyota LandCruiser Prado. Next to it was a Mercedes ML500 2015 and then an Accord of the same year. She was never the type to freak over cars, she once told me.

“Hey Joe. You’re welcome” Funke said as she ushered me in dressed in a t-shirt and bum shorts. She always looked rounder and less intimidating when at home as opposed to her suited up and serious persona when at the office.

“I was just about to go have dinner. Come and join me.”

I checked my watch. It was 5:43 pm. “Dinner?” I asked.

“Yes. What? You think it’s too early for dinner? You need to change that thought Joe. See how big my belly is when I’m not putting on one of those waist-slimming belts?” she asked and I could see that she had a wonderful pouch. “It’s always advisable to have your dinner before 7 or 8pm at the most.”

“I work out. I don’t need to worry about all that.”

“You think I don’t work out? The female body and the male body don’t work the same way, Joe.”

“Of course. The female body is obviously well crafted and more beautiful than the male body. All those rise and falls. Those mountains and valleys.”

Funke stared at me for a moment and shook her head. “You’re really something else Joe.” I laughed.

We had dinner and I immensely enjoyed the meal. Funke paid the cook off and he left after preserving the leftover in the refrigerator. We then sat down in the sitting room, having small talk and watching TV, she began sipping her white wine while I sipped vodka. I’d had too much of it for the day but there was I having more.

“You know Kemi got engaged two days ago?” Funke suddenly asked.

“Wow. Really?” I asked, bewildered.

“Yeah. Some guy. Works an offshore job but is trying to get transferred to the main office of his company.”

“That’s fantastic. Happy for her.”

“Are you sure about that? Whatever really happened between you guys.”

“Kemi escalated a small misunderstanding between us, more than she should, then she asked for some space and got angry that I wasn’t even trying to get her back during that time, didn’t call. Only texted a few times. She took things out of proportion and I couldn’t be bothered to make her see things differently. She left. She resigned from the office because she didn’t want anything to do with me and that was it.”

“Did you love her, Joe?”

I chuckled. “I felt something for her. Something more than the usual fleeting emotions of lust or desire. We may have worked if she had given it a chance.”

“It didn’t seem odd that you were fucking me at the time you guys were dating.”

I laughed.”Why are you asking any of this Funke? You knew quite well Kemi and I had something going on before you…”

“It’s alright. Don’t answer that. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have brought it up.” she said just before taking a long sip from her glass of wine before pouring herself another glass. I sat there looking at her as we both sat in silence.

I glanced at the wall clock. 6:34. I wondered if I was still going to do what I came to do. Maybe I should’ve made a move earlier on instead of trying to be civil and polite. This was Funke. A lady who had fucked me on the couch in her office. A lady who once sucked my dick in a secluded part of the parking lot. A lady that grabbed my dick once under the conference table while we were at a meeting with the departmental heads. What the fuck was I even doing trying to be civil and polite?

“My girlfriend left me today. Ugochi. We were in the kitchen and I proposed to her and she said she wasn’t ready to get married. I was willing to wait, maybe give her time to finish her schooling and do her service but she told me she thought that we were just having fun. So it had me thinking. Maybe that’s what I’m all about. Having fun. Fucking every every girl that catches my fancy and dumping them when I find someone new. Maybe that’s just who I am and I’m never going to change. I’m probably going to be as miserable as this forever.”

Funke remained quiet after I’d finished my sob-speech. I already began to feel stupid for spilling so much and hoping for some form of sympathy sex. That was the lowest shit I’d ever done for sex. I really had become miserable.

I suddenly wanted to leave and return to my place to avoid further embarrassment. I had been so drunk and worked up before making that call earlier to Funke that I had not given it any thought at all that I was throwing myself at a person who only wanted me for sexual satisfaction.
I had decided that I wasn’t ever going to be her plaything ever again and there I was. In her sitting room. Telling my sad story and expecting an “Awwwnnn oya come and suck breast”

The first thing Funke did was to drop her glass of wine, pick up the bottle and gulp down its remaining contents. I know she was lightheaded so finishing off a 12% volume alcoholic beverage was going to be a lot for her. She threw the bottle to a side and I wondered how it didn’t shatter.

She stood up and undid her shorts. I watched her as she struggled to wiggle out of it. Her thighs were so huge that it took a while to get them past that area. After much wiggle and much effort, she got rid of them to reveal her bare crotches. She caressed her crotch and moaned. I gulped. I suddenly felt all the urges that I’d been wanting to quench earlier build up once more in my body. She walked towards me in just a top and no shorts and I sat there like a King awaiting his Queen. She straddled me as I sat there and brought her face to mine.

“Remember the day that you came late and I fucked you in your office? That was my best sex in a long while. I don’t know how it happened but it did and since then I’ve had the hots between my thighs for you. I know it’s just something sexual but I know that you’ve enjoyed your moments with me the same way I have enjoyed mine with you.”

She kissed me. “If you want me to stop… Just say the word.”

She continued kissing me while her hands went all over my body. I tasted the sweetness in her mouth and the desire in her tongue. I caressed her body and grabbed her soft buttcheeks. I ran a finger through her ass crack until I got to her pussy from beneath. I played with it a little before putting the finger inside, feeling her wetness as her walls clenched. She had already taken off my shirt and was reaching for my crouch to undo my belt and take off my trousers.

We were glued to each other, her body over mine as we continued to kiss and lick at each other. She still had on her t-shirt and I wasn’t planning to take it off but I reached in and played with her nipples. She yearned and yelped like a puppy when finally I had gotten free of my trousers and underwear and my dick stood erect beneath her booty.

She used her pussy lips to rub against the length of my dick. Getting to the tip and gliding back in. She finally let me in, her face just inches away from mine while she looked into my eyes. I looked back at her, feeling her slippery warmth around me and wanting to remain in her forever. Her hips began to move as she raised her buttocks slowly and brought them back down. Funke and I had never had sex on a bed before and that was the best part about what we did. There was no lovemaking involved. Just two people fucking each other. The movement of her hips on top of me increased as she picked up pace and rocked me and the creaking sofa.

It was leather but it felt softest than leather. Funke fucked me with her face buried in the hollow of my neck while I grabbed her buttcheeks and squeezed, savouring the sweetness of everything as my balls began to constrict and I could feel my orgasm approaching. Even without foreplay, it didn’t take quite long for Funke to reach her own climax. She was one of the very few women I knew who came quickly just from penetration.

When I heard her crying and calling on her god to probably come save her from such a magnificent feeling, I grabbed her hips and proceeded to thrust into her from beneath. I’d already had a lot of sex the previous night and that morning so I didn’t have as much vigour in me but I managed to keep my thrusts going in for about ten seconds before I felt my climax grip my body and I shot the whole of seed deep into her vagina. Funke screamed obscenities and continued to move her hips around my crotch till her pussy swallowed up the whole of my seed.

We remained like that as we caught our breath. We were sweating but the cool drafts from the air conditioner soothed our bodies while we descended from the apex.

“Why didn’t you stop me?” she finally asked.

“Because I have a question for you.”

“And what question is that, Joe?”

“Will you marry me?”

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Written by
Dr. Deolu Oniranu-Bubble


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