Average Joe (18+) : Sister Evelyn - 'Deolu #ONIRANU Bubble!
April 21, 2021

Average Joe (18+) : Sister Evelyn
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Average Joe (18+) : Sister Evelyn


The preacher’s voice boomed from the speakers as he talked more about heaven and hell. His baritone was rich, and very powerful. I am very sure the heavens and earth trembled at the sound of it. I was being preached to because I was in a church. Yeah, Joe goes to church too; although, this wasn’t my church. A friend of mine had invited me. A pretty lady named Evelyn. So let me tell you how pretty Evelyn persuaded me to attend her church.

It’s a very short story…

I was out on one of my usual evening walks during the weekdays. It was a beautiful Tuesday evening. I just wanted to go out and admire nature a bit then I stopped at a supermarket to get a bottle of soda. Just as I was about leaving, these ladies walk up to me with fliers, inviting me to their church.

They had a programme coming up the next week and were trying to get as much people as they could to attend. I received such fliers a lot, but what I usually did was squeeze them and throw them in the next bin I see. This one should have ended up with the same fate, but the lady who had given me the flier started talking to me in a very sweet voice, almost angelic (like I’d ever heard an angel speak) and that was how we got in this long conversation.

Her female companion had to leave her and continue on her ‘missionary journey’. So that day, I found out her name was Evelyn, and also found out that she was a student at the State university, and that she was single and that she loved to sing, and dance, and liked watching Nollywood movies. I also got her number before she left to continue sharing fliers. I’d gotten all that information because I’d told her that the only reason I’d attend her church was if she gave me honest answers to every question I asked, and she did…

A day later I was gathering up papers that littered my table to throw them in the waste basket when I saw the flier that Evelyn had given to me. Instinctively I turned the back of the paper to find the number she’d scrawled on it. I paused for a minute, trying to reason what to do. To call her or not? Too many beautiful women in your life Joe, do you really need to add one more? I grabbed my phone and dialed her number. She picked almost immediately it rang…

“Hello” the sweet voice that had captivated me

“Hey, guess who?” I asked trying to surprise her

“Uhmm, sorry. I’m not a good guesser” She replied

“Just try. I know you can.” I tried persuading her

“Oh gosh, just tell me who you are already” She gave up

“Its me, Frank. So you can’t remember my voice anymore?” I joked

“Frank?” I almost laughed at the way her sweet voice changed to one of disdain “Which Frank, please?” she said

“So, Evelyn…you’re pretending not to remember me right?” I replied

“Gosh, I’m sorry. I lost my phone and all my contacts went with it. Please, Frank, can you just tell me exactly who you are so I can remember you?” She pleaded

I decided to put her out of her misery, and told her who I truly was. She screamed OMG, laughed so hard and ended the call, I wondered why she ended the call.

I chuckled and waited.

A few seconds later she called back, she apologized for being hysterical on the phone then we talked. Her credit got exhausted and then I called her, and we talked some more. We just felt certain chemistry between each other when we talked. She was quite hilarious at times, told jokes that I could laugh at so this affection between us grew.

She always wanted to know how I was doing, how my day was going, if I slept well the previous night, if I’d had nightmares or sweet dreams, and also to remind me about the upcoming programme at her church.

A couple of days before I was to attend her church, I asked her out, told her I wanted to take her somewhere nice and special. She was apprehensive at first, but then I proceeded to fill her ears with lies of how she had been occupying my mind all day and all night and how i’d dreamt about her the night before and also the night before the night before.

Finally, after all the ‘washing’… she accepted.

I wanted to be extremely cautious with her since she was a ‘Christian Sister’ so I promised myself to be as polite and Gentlemanly as possible. On getting to the place where she was waiting for me to pick her from, I was shocked at what I saw.

I’d expected her to dress conservatively, given that she was a Holy woman of God. Her dress was one to cause quite a lot of stares with the way it clung tight to her body and revealed her explicit curves. I swallowed spit before I talked to her and told her how beautiful and dashing she looked. My mind was already racing ahead of me. 2 or 3 hours later from now, this pretty chic should be on my bed with my face between her legs. It has to end that way, Joe, it has to, I gingered myself.

Our date was wonderful. The food was delicious, her company was quite entertaining. I felt a lot of pride in having men stare at her and us especially because of her exquisite beauty. During our conversation that night, Evelyn asked me why I was single. I have this prepared lie I usually tell ladies (I wanted to have sex with) who asked me that question. I tell them that I haven’t found the woman who truly understands me.

But the truth is, I can never be truly understood. It is impossible, I didn’t tell her any of that though, I just smiled and told her that God had been keeping me single because he wanted me to meet the right person…and she was sitting before me.

I used every expertise I knew to make her want me just as I wanted her that night. At the end of the dinner though, I knew my plan wasn’t going to work. She told me it was getting late and she needed to return home before it got too late. I genuinely obliged to take her home. There will be another chance, Joe, I told myself.

When we reached the place where I’d picked her up earlier that evening, she looked at me, placed a hand on my lap and told me she’d had a very beautiful evening and was very grateful to me for it. My whole body trembled the moment that hand touched my lap.

My dick began to rise immediately as sensations filled my body, just from that gentle touch. I looked at her in the eye and asked her what she thought about what I’d said about my feelings for her. She returned my gaze, without blinking, a half smile on her lips and a dimple on her cheek. A few seconds of silence passed between us, then she leaned towards me, and kissed me.

I felt her lips on mine, our tongues found eachother. Her hand was still on my lap, and then I felt it move towards my crotch, and the bulge that was my enlarging dick.  I reached around her to embrace her tightly, thinking to myself that I had succeeded. My plans had not failed after all, she was going to be mine tonight…

Suddenly, she got away from me, our lips making a sound as they parted. She opened the door, got out from the car, closed the door and bent to look at me through the window. I rolled down the glass to hear what it is she wanted to say.

“Come for the programme tomorrow night, and I’ll give you my answer after then. Goodbye Joe”

That was how I found myself being preached to by the man of God with the powerful voice, waiting patiently for the service to end so I could receive my answer from Evelyn. I’d thought about that moment in the car all night when I got home and in the morning as well.

The touch on my lap, the French kiss, the warmth of her tongue, the feeling that I had triumphed, then the sudden departure, and her last words. I was hearing the Pastor preach, but I was paying no attention to it. My thoughts were virtually on Evelyn. When the Pastor had finished preaching, and prayers had been said, the choir rose to sing a last song, and I saw her once more, looking even prettier than the night before.

I stood outside as the congregation dispersed, waited a few minutes, before I dialed her number. She asked me where I was, and I told her where I’d parked my car. She told me to give her a couple of minutes more, I agreed and waited. Even if she wanted me to wait 2 more hours, I’m quite sure I would still have agreed. The things we do for ‘love’ right?

She came out five minutes later to find me where I stood gazing into oblivion. She had that half-smile on her face, which showed her dimple.

She stood 3 steps away from me, arms folded, not saying anything. I had my hands in my pockets, not saying anything either.

“So, how was the service?” she asked, “Did you enjoy it?”

I shrugged. “It was nice.”

Maybe next thing she would ask me was if I could tell her what the Pastor’s message was all about

“Let’s go to your place” she said.

I was surprised again at her suddenness. She had so many twists to her, and that was one of the reasons why I got attracted to her so much.

The drive to my place was one of small talk. There was an awkward tension between us. I wasn’t bothered by it though. It was late in the evening, and I was taking this pretty lady who had occupied my thoughts throughout the day, to my crib. The night was surely going to end well.

Evelyn was hungry, so I prepared something for her to eat. She ate in silence, while I looked at her. Every time she noticed my gaze, she smiled and bent her head to continue with the food; like she was feigning timidity.

I was beginning to wonder if this was the same chic I’d taken to dinner the day before. If this was a twin that knew the whole story.  if I was being played, Shit like that happens, but I’ve never experienced it before. After she was done with her food, she looked at me again and didn’t want to say anything.

I had to call her name and ask her if she was okay. I tried to let her know that she didn’t have to give me her reply that day, because it seemed she was not in such a good mood. Unknown to me, it was all a façade.

We were watching a Nollywood movie; A romantic one. She sat beside me on the sofa (that sofa has surely been through a lot *sigh*) but not within the reach of my outstretched arm then as I sat there and noticed, all her attention was drawn to the movie. The way ladies will react when they’re watching one of those Hollywood romance movies, which had all the love and all the drama. I never knew a girl like her could be so engulfed in Nollywood.

She almost forgot that I sat right there next to her and giggled and laughed all through the movie coupled with the occasional “awwwwwww”

I forced myself to watch the annoying movie with her, just to see what would happen after it had ended. I didn’t have to wait long…her excitement got to an extent that she screamed, then quickly covered her mouth and looked at me looking at her with my mouth opened in amazement.

Then we exchanged a stare that was familiar to me. One that spoke of the thoughts we both had in our mind but couldn’t speak. This was the way we looked at each other that night, before we kissed. I couldn’t hold myself anymore…in the twinkle of an eye, my lips was on hers already, crushing hard against hers.  My arms were wrapped around her body and hers were around mine…in a passionate embrace, I tried to get my hands into her ample bosoms.

I could feel my heart crashing hard against my chest as my desire grew within me. Evelyn was breathing hard and fast as she tried to undo my shirt, battling with my buttons. She quickly removed it and threw it to the side, then used her slender hands to caress my bare skin. She licked and sucked on my nipples, and even nibbled on them, driving me half-insane with pleasure.

I could feel her tugging at my belt already as she tried to get rid of the last remaining pieces of clothing on me. My trousers were off soon and only my boxer shorts remained, showing the erection that my dick had become. I observed her through all this, and was wondering what had happened to the girl who I’d seen in church earlier that night.

But those thoughts left me very quickly and were replaced by thoughts of heaven when I felt her lips around my cock, sucking me with so much hunger. She stroked and massaged it for a bit before putting it in her mouth again and sucking it like it was coated with honey, her level of expertise was impressive, she certainly isn’t new to this sort of things.

Her head bouncing as she sucked on my dick. She used her tongue to lick the tip of my rod, the whole act giving me much pleasure. I was beginning to move my hips…I needed to do some real thrusting. I stopped her then and lifted her, walked towards the bedroom.

We got there and I placed her on my bed and got on top of her. I proceeded to take off her clothes. She was wearing bikini-like underwear with colourful patterns. Her boobs were not all that from what I could see but i was amazed by this size of her nipples, they looked thick… then my eyes got down to her hips and the perfect shape of it, the sight of her hips steered more erection.

Those hips that had made men stare at her the night before when we had dinner. I was about to covert her coochie for my desert for the night. Her chest rose and fell as she breathed and waited for me to make my move.

I put a finger on her nipples and circled it around, she held my hand over her boobs and pressed it hard against her chest. My other hand was massaging her crotch even with her panties on and her waist moved beneath me. She pulled my head up and kissed me like her life depended on it, slow and hard.

I removed that finger from her boobs and traced a line down, between her boobs and down to her stomach. When I got to her belly button, I tickled it and traced ticklish lines around it…with my other hand now inserting a finger into her dripping orifice. She moaned deeply and arched her back, her waist still moving beneath me, desire coursed through her body as she squirmed and pushed her crotch against my fondling finger.

I brought my lips to pussy and kissed her while my fingers vigorously fucking her pussyhole. She hissed and exclaimed in a very low sexy voice as I continued to use my finger on her pussy. My dick was throbbing…and waiting…for its master to call it to ‘duty’. I took my head back upwards, leaving my finger to finger her.

Evelyn was whispering in my ear, mumbling sweet obscenities, calling me names and urging me to fuck her. She used the exact word. I kissed her all over her body, and finally brought my lips to her crotch, which had ‘lost’ the colorful panties.

I used my tongue to tickle her pussy lips again. I then parted them with my fingers to reveal the pinkness within. I licked hard on that pinkness. Then I held both her thighs with my hands and proceeded to engulf her orifice. I put the tip of my dick in slowly, pulled out, pushed back in for a full penetration, brought it out again, torturing her with pleasure. Her orifice was soaking wet, when I could feel her tempo rising to its utmost peak, I pushed my throbbing dick in and started fucking her slowly with full penetration.

Her vaginal walls accepted the penetration of my hot rod. I pushed in until I had gotten to the end, touching her uterus. The warmth I felt around my skin brought intense pleasure to my senses. I started slowly, going in and out of her, I knelt in front of her pussy, holding one leg against my chest, the other leg at another angle on the bed. Her countenance was erotic as she opened her mouth, shut her eyes completely, with her boobs sitting pretty on chest, I sneaked a pinch on her boobs, she pushed my hands away still complete shut eye. Her whole body trembled with her first orgasm and I felt her warm juices as it bathed my penetrating cock.I continued fucking her, increasing my tempo as she body moved up and down to the rhythm of my thrusts.

I increased my thrust speed again, trying to bring another wave of pleasure to her and myself too. Even as I thrust, her vaginal wall squeezed against my dick, and her voice filled my ears with the same sweet gibberish that she had been speaking. We switched positions into doggy style, one of my favourites, ramming my meat stick into her orifice from behind.

Her hands behind her, separating her butt cheeks further and urge me even deeper, and I felt my dick enlarge within her. I thought of anal sex but dropped the idea, as her scream became louder. It occurred then to me that another orgasm had gripped her…while she still exclaimed from this second wave of orgasmic pleasure, I made her lie completely face down on the bed and raise her massive butt up to me. I continued hitting her hard and fast from behind, I went into auto-pilot, the fun was more for me than her at this point.

She pushed her waist backwards into my dick as I pushed forward to reach the end of her pussy walls with my dick. She was past being sane now, and whatever she was saying didn’t matter to me. what did matter was the sound of her voice….and the sexiness of it.

My dick was throbbing harder than normal now. I brought out my dick once more and began spanking her bouncy ass, the way they jiggled excited me more, I put back my dick and continued pummelling her,I held her perfectly curved hips at both sides and slammed hard against her ass. It made that clap sound that usually drives me nuts…and soon I couldn’t hold myself again. I allowed my hip do the rest of the work then the feeling came over me, one that made me grunt like an animal and scream like a raving lunatic. My seed shot  out of my dick just as I was removing it from her and spurt on her shiny ass-cheeks.

I collapsed beside her, trying to catch my breath. My eyes were closed, and the next thing on my mind was sleep. But no I couldn’t just sleep. Evelyn was not just another prostitute. She meant more than that to me.

I opened my eyes to find her lying beside me, and looking at me…that half- smile on her lips…the dimple on her cheek. I wondered what was going through her mind, as she must have wondered what was going through mine.

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Written by
Dr. Deolu Oniranu-Bubble


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