The statement above is very cliché, and everyone’s answer is always yes but the sad truth is that most of us can’t handle the truth! Tempers will flare, attitudes will change but after the dust settles, is the relationship back to normal?
It has been used in several movies, from local movies to international movies, from marriages on the verge of collapse to mob bosses and people coming out of the closet, okay ignore that list from marriages downwards.
Let’s focus on relationships in this post; At the beginning of relationships, partners endeavour to share almost every dirty little secret or experience they’ve faced in their ‘past’ life in an effort to be open with each other. I believe some tiny little details are always left out in this revealing process and you must admit that you don’t wanna hear some of these so-called ‘truth’.
Okay, let me paint you a scenario. If your girl friend used to be a prostitute or used to shag your father or used to be the office/street slut, would you say you were not at any point sceptical that she might not be the one for you? Let me also say this before I continue, for the fact that you put yourself out there and dress sexual as you can imagine doesn’t mean he’ll take you serious. I have one advice for ladies, for some of us guys, I don’t think we enjoy seeing you look like a freaking rainbow in the name of colour-blocking. Can you not colour-block for the love of God?
It sickens me as girls now look so freaking bright all in the name of fashion that I can’t wait for this façade of fashion to pass away. What happened with regular colours ladies use to wear without looking like a Ojuju calabar? Ehn
I’m sorry, I just had to write about that colour-blocking thing, it has been on my mind for months now, it’s fine that I have gotten that out of my system.
Moving on, guys always ask for the truth, but don’t believe our plea to hear your deepest darkest secret because it will be used against you someday no matter how long it takes.
As much as he loves you he wouldn’t want to marry some girl who used to date Alhajis. It’s sad enough that we know some of those men are fetish but then to get married and then we find out that you can’t have kids until we both fast for 70 days and 70 nights on something we have no knowledge about is absolutely disheartening.
You would agree with me that bad girls make the best wives through their thorough knowledge of guys and their wants. I know some of the craziest girls and guess what they married close to the best husbands, one even married a Pastor, cool guy.
Some men guard against this sort of problem by impregnating before marriage which is a topic for another day. This pregnancy before marriage is a measure to guard against man-made barrenness in ladies. I call it man-made because its due to recklessness on the lady’s part through several abortions or other fetish reasons. As a guy, there is little that can be done because even if you ask her to get pregnant before marriage and she fakes pregnancy before marriage and after she lies about miscarriage, that’s one scenario.
Another scenario is if she actually gets pregnant and has a still-birth and after that period, she doesn’t get pregnant again? Its really about the grace of God in marriages and child conception.
There is certainly another angle to look at it from if he finds out the truth about something you lied about without you telling him, that will certainly backfire but what you can do to guard against that is to hint him.
Hint him about it??? Yes, hint him about it, make sure during a casual conversation about similar topic you hint about doing something in that regard yourself with friends or something so when he hears about it, he has an idea about and safely defends you citing it that she told you one way or the other.
I’m not saying that’s a foolproof plan but it’s better than been mute about it. Don’t you agree?
As for guys, you will have to torture us to get it out of some of us. We will never be the item of mockery, so you might as well forget about telling the truth on some matters. I had to learn it the hard way.
A couple of years back, I was seeing this lady and for some reason, I never told her my real age. I kept it that way for a long while and we were so in love. She would have been at least 5 years older than me or even more. Love they say complicates things, I was in love and one day after we had sex, I told her that I hadn’t been completely honest about my age, that X was my age, now read carefully, the X I gave her wasn’t even my real age, I was actually X-3.
She was angry (and I don’t blame her) and for over 2 months I didn’t hear from her. She refused to pick my calls or reply my texts and IMs. She was never home whenever I visited. As crazy as it was, I really liked her. This is where I learnt not to divulge information of sensitive nature to ladies.
So many other scenarios that you know and have heard about; Can you actually handle the truth you’re asking for? When I say handle the truth, I don’t mean it for you to use it badly but to still be the man/woman you were before you heard it.
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