Hi Peeps, how are you doing? It’s another week, thankfully it’s a public holiday. Everyone loves Ice Prince Public Holidays. Thanks for the support on this blog, totally grateful for the awesome people who keep sending in their interviews and posts, #GGMUB.
Moving on to today’s matter. I keep asking myself how long should you know someone before you marry the person? Everyone has their own opinions about that. Some would say 6 months, some would advice 2 years. The opinions on this matter are diverse.
What actually prompted this post is that I met a lady, young actually, she’s about 26, she’s married. 26 Isn’t too young an age to marry, I’m sure. I mean Kanu Nwankwo’s wife Amara, got married at the age of 19. The point is we got talking, I started teasing her, asking her how ‘sweet’ her marriage was going. In our conversation, she told me she’s been married for over a year. I was quite impressed that she could get her acts together and marry at that age but the problem was that the guy is based in the States. So, I’m wondering in a very young marriage, your husband already stays far away. She said she is supposed to go over there and start their family but you know how getting immigration papers are….always taking time.
The point I took out of the whole conversation was that she mentioned something that if she had known some of the characters her husband had while they were dating, she wouldn’t have married him. That statement shattered me inside, so naturally I asked her, how many years she has been dating the guy and she replied she has known him for 8 years but dated for about 4-5 years.
At this point, I was about to scream that how can you not know your partner even after about 5 years of dating, and 8 years of knowing him. I was perplexed. What is the world coming to, my problem with her was that I felt it was too early for her to be saying something like that, after a year of marriage she’s almost regretting it?
The issue of marriage is just so confusing, naturally our parents or lemme say my own folks won’t expect you to marry someone you’ve known for less than a year. Ideally, my mum would advice you date someone for 2 years, which makes sense but I know a lady who got married after dating her husband for about 3 months. Oh yes, I do know them, we stay on the same street. They have a kid and all, I hear gossips that the husband who is a manager in one of the recently acquired banks is a ruthless womanizer. I’m not judging but they seem happy.
Even the couple we all adore and use as a yardstick for marriage are getting a divorce, the case of Seal and Heidi Klum is rather unusual, A Supermodel married to one of the most unattractive men, I feel its ideal to call him a beast and Heidi, beauty. They’ve been married for about 6 years, although they’ve not told us exactly what happened.
Is the strength of commitment based on how long you’ve known each other or just how much you’ve connected. Its all so confusing. So many divorces last year. What is the recipe for a fruitful relationship and marriage. There were a few divorces when our parents got married. I mean marriages during the 70/early 80’s. What are we doing wrong.
Help me understand this, how long is okay to plan your future with someone?
